Wounded Healer

I am a Wounded Healer.

It took me 60+ years to own this truth and my humanity still pokes at my doubts. But this is my path. I am a healer in that Spirit works through me. I am committed to following Divine inspiration, the song of Mother Earth is powerfully healing and loving.

It has been a path of pain and disconnection for the longer part of my life, not because I am bad and deserve pain and disconnection, but because I grew up in an American family in the 50's and 60's. A family asleep to their own pain and trauma, watching Disney, following slick marketers who sold household appliances and pulled us into propaganda politics via news media, people valued for their productivity in the money system of profit, greed, corruption and we were at war. Women owned by their husbands. Hatred toward anyone not like "us".

I was abused as an infant, shaken to the core, innocent and stuffed with guilt, hatred and shame. Victim of my lineages dysfunctional patterns of violence in thought, word and action and their inability/inacessability to process their trauma. My family grew humans who did not know their connection to the Earth, or to them selves. So alone, hating themselves. And then, after years of feeble and gallant attempts to do my best at this life with what I was given, Mother Earth reached into my heart with her mossy words and woke me up. She held me, and sang to me and visited me as Butterflies, Chipmonks, Indigo buntings, Turkeys, Deer, Snake, Panther, Frog, Raven, Owl and Eagle. We talked, we danced...how did that happen?! Of course everything had to change.

Some say I healed mySelf, and it is true that

I opened to ceremony, to extended times of living on the land here in the Driftless. Of drinking wild water, of kneeling on the Earth, of breathing in the sweet energy she offers. Of studying and practicing and developing...always running to catch up. I ate nettles for breakfast. I have followed the path laid in front of me to this place.

Today I have many non human friends. Ancestors of compassion and depth. Basswood, such a staunch ally. In all of it I am allowing mySelf to feel more into my humanity. To praise this wondrous world and grieve the emgrams of my grandmother's trauma...